My Enduring Road to Mindfulness

I believe plants exist within perfect ebb and flow of universal Wu Wei, and I believe most animals exist in a natural state of the perpetual Now. No worry or anxiety for the future. No regret for the past. Only living fully in the Now.

In the simplest terms I know, I think Man's original and innate state of existence is an enlightened and meditative one (not to be confused with contemplative). We're just fallen out of tune with Nature.

So how do we reconnect? How do we heal our spirit? There has to be numerous paths and avenues to do so. I can only speak of my own.

Although my spiritual journey began over 25 years ago, the most recent turn of events begins in an odd and unexpected place. Martial arts.

I had studied Traditional Taekwon-do for over 4 years under Master Florin Fratean (7th degree black belt, and original student of this martial arts' founder, General Choi Hong Hi). Towards the end, what had  caught my attention and intrigued me the most was something called Jungshin Sooyang. It is the philosophy underlying the martial art itself, a moral code if you will, heavily influenced by the Tao Teh Ching (Taoism) with some Buddhism. But you didn't need to be a Black Belt or even practice the martial art to live Jungshin Sooyang. It is a way of life and carried the potential for introspection and growth.

Towards the end of Jungshin Sooyang there is an elusive mention of a practice named Jung Joong Dong, but precious little detail or instruction.

It is difficult to study and pursue this Jung Joong Dong on one's own. There is little to no reference or material online. However, as frustrating as this may be, it is actually not a bad thing. Online information can be deceptive, misleading, and limited in scope. The expression is true that a little bit of information can be a dangerous thing. We all know someone who believes they're an expert of a topic because of online information. (Medical self-diagnosis is a prime example of this).

Google and Wikipedia do not make me an expert of any topic. Information and knowledge are different things. I refer back to my martial arts Master and teacher of Taekwon-do. Although you can find any given technique or pattern (Tul) online (it is only information or data at best), it cannot teach you how to practice it. It must be taught and learned. Knowledge comes from a mentor-protégé relationship.

Research into the term Jung Joong Dong finds little reference. Its translation is "stillness in motion". Research into its English translation reveals mostly Walking Meditation(s). However, I think precaution is needed here. I have experienced Jung Joong Dong while practicing my Tuls (patterns) in Taekwon-do, and patterns are not walking.

Just as all Jucuzzi's are hot tubs, but not all hot tubs are Jucuzzi's, so too Walking Meditations are a variation of Jung Joong Dong, but not all Jung Joong Dong are walking meditations.

Jung Joong Dong is mentioned near the end of Jungshin Sooyang, but as it is described by General Choi, its purpose appears to be significantly more like the self-reflection of the Mindfulness Tradition. I had unknowingly experienced this mindfulness during my Black Belt Examination and the experience launched my pursuit, investigation and research into it.

I had begun by not getting bogged down in the minute details of the differences between what Jung Joong Dong might be and what Walking Meditations are, and focused on their purpose as briefly described in Jungshin Sooyang; self-reflection and mindfulness.

Professor Mark W. Muesse, Ph.D. has a course and series of lectures (c. 12 hours) on these topics and issues (a downloadable PDF is also available), entitled Practicing Mindfulness: An Introduction to Meditation.

~

Meditation is a subject of paradoxes. I cringe at using the word Meditation. It's a loaded word. It comes with its own baggage. I could have ten conversations with ten people and all ten will bring their own understanding, definitions (right or wrong) and biases to the conversation, and at no point will anyone question that we are talking about different things but with the same name.

It is probably one of the most private things you can practice, yet its benefits are also for all those around you, for in time they will benefit from it too.

However, although the practical aspect of it is private, the theoretical aspect - the learning of it - is not necessarily.

It can be a difficult and slow go going solo. If you pick up a bad habit chances are it will become deeply ingrained and established within your private practice.  There is a good argument to be made that one should be taught and have some sort of group of peers to reflect, learn, discuss, and share with.

However, having this group of peers or a teacher is different than group meditation.

We all have our own biases and I am no different, so please bear this in mind. Firstly, I think there is a difference between practicing group meditation and teaching a group to meditate.

I have no problem admitting that maybe I totally miss the point of group meditation. I don't see the benefit or purpose of it. Yes, it could build a sense of solidarity or community, but there are better ways to accomplish this, in my opinion. (The simple act of eating with one another - 'breaking bread' - is probably the most effective starting point). Group meditation seems to carry the flavour of fanaticism and cult with it.

Teaching or learning as a group - although it should necessitate some degree of practicing as a group - has a different purpose. It is to share and reinforce and solidify good or productive habits/practices and to correct or 'weed out' poor or hindering habits.

You take the lessons to your private practice. Your practice isn't the group practice.

For over the past year I have been 'going solo'. I have had some informal training. I have used both Buddhist and Taoist discussion forums in place of a peer group, but these online discussion forums are plagued with their own pitfalls. They are not up close and personal. I am not, and never have been, keen on formal organized religions.

I am entering year five of this "research", journey, exploration, call it what you will.
It is time to reach out; to practice and learn and be taught in a somewhat more formal setting. It has been difficult to find meditation being taught without the baggage of religion attached to it, but I think I may have succeeded.

Let's see where this next leg of the journey leads.

~~~

Meditation, Contemplation (Reflection) and finally, Action

The Watcher, The Dreamer, the Other, and Myself

I have never been good at most sitting meditations, although I have practiced them for decades.

When sitting on the ground - whether in half-lotus, full-lotus, cross-legged, with a cushion or without - I will inevitably slump forward (bad for the breath) and eventually fall asleep. It's just the way it is.

When sitting on a chair (most commonly on the bus) I - once again - eventually fall asleep.

How I normally practice meditation is for 20-30 minutes in the early morning - before the family and household is awake. I practice sitting meditation using a seiza bench. I have never fallen asleep on my seiza bench to date.

Now, my commute to work is about a 40 minute bus ride. I don't know whether I'm just stubborn or a slow learner, but regardless of my past experiences I still attempt to meditate on the bus.... sitting... and I still end up falling asleep. However, this past week, I had a profoundly bizarre experience.

Last week, while 'meditating' on the bus - while still "sharp" and conscious within the confines of my head - I realized I not only fell asleep, but was beginning to dream. While fully cognizant, I watched myself dream.



I watched alongside the dull and groggy Dreamer what seemed like a unconnected jumble of images and half-understood stories. And oddly enough, some other part of my mind was acutely aware of where my bus was, because before my bus stop, I chose to awaken The Dreamer and depart the bus.

My question is, who is The Dreamer? Or maybe more importantly, who is The Watcher?

Solace and Compassion: Black Belt Thesis

Originally Submitted Jan. 2012
(Edited version)

Introduction

When asked to write this piece about my experiences here as a student of Master Florin Fratean, I was tempted to take the easiest path and speak of my experiences and 'adventures', my accomplishes and failures in the school itself. However, of everything I have experienced, learned and been taught - the various techniques, patterns, sparring, board breaking, tournaments, playing the rolls of referee and judge, the physical conditioning, and the health benefits – I came to realize all of these features (bonuses really) are most definitely measurable and testable; as they are clearly observed and literally tested during the Belt Testings.

I could talk of Master Florin as a great teacher and instructor, as I'm sure many will (and there is a great amount to be said and written about this, to be sure!) However, I decided to take the less traveled path and speak of my experiences in Taekwon-do outside the school. To speak of Taekwon-do's spiritual nature. (And yes, I am aware this might make you cringe at first).

Taekwon-do. The most obvious translation is “The Way of the Foot and Hand.”

Tae - “to break with foot”, Kwon - “to break with hand”, and Do... I believe it is the “do” that is most important. The “Do” is borrowed from the Chinese Dao, or Tao, meaning the way or path or route to something. The Tao is the fundamental nature of the universe, and I think that is important to note, for I believe it is this fundamental nature of the universe that this martial art ambitiously reaches for.

The gist of this piece is Taekwon-do's value within myself and outside the school in the world we live in.

Tattoo

I have been questioned by some as to why I am tattooed.

All of my tattoos have deeply personal and spiritual significance. Each has a story to tell.

Our greatest moments of growth are often during our most painful experiences. The only difference between myself and the “un-inked” is that I wear my scars on my sleeve; literally in my skin.

I have a large dragon-tattoo on my back. (A painful 25 hour ordeal). A good friend of my wife from Taipei, Taiwan, tells me that, in her culture, the dragon as a tattoo represents a sort of protection from harm and fear. However, it isn't that the dragon is tattooed on one's body that give it its power but that it exists within one's heart.

It is with humility that I share part of my history, my story of my tattoo, not to brag or show off. Quite the opposite. I have been asked once, why would I get such a large, painful, and expensive piece when nobody would see it? But that's the very point; it is not for anyone else. It is an outward expression of an inward conviction. It is solely for myself.

The Asian Dragon can represent many things, often symbolizing power, strength, courage, and Indomitable spirit (Baekjul Bulgul). However, in my case its significance is far beyond this common symbolism. This tattoo is a summation of my spiritual journeyⁱ to date and these last three and a half years as a student of Master Florin in Taekwon-do play a very heavy influence.

~

I have always been aware of a deep spiritual nature in Taekwon-do.

No, not religious. Religiosity would be its opposite. And no, I do not mean “spiritual” as in New Age hocus-pocus. My understanding of spiritual is a simple but vitally important one. Spirituality teaches us how to cope with ourselves and with others. Really, it is nothing more than Solace and Compassion. (Even the Atheist benefits from a spiritual health. Religion has little to no place in what I speak of).

I think it is for this reason since the first day I walked in this school as a white belt, up to and including today, that two particular points caught my interest and continue to capture and hold my attention.

Guk Gi (Self-Control) and Taekwon-do's 5^th oath (“I shall built a more peaceful world”).

These two features blend extremely easily with spirituality;

Solace (for the self) and Compassion (for others).

Solace is the Fruit of Guk Gi

Clearly Self-Control applies to learning when to reign in our power¹. Most especially during sparring. To have the ability to use only 50%; to not go 'full out'; to hold back from outright fighting or 'brawling'. Even to control our emotions and our temper. We must not allow our anger to override us.

Its opposite is just as true. We see this during board breaking. In this case we want to attempt to release 100% of our power. It is still, never-the-less, control.

But I believe Guk Gi can and does extend far beyond these examples.

I believe Solace is the fruit of Guk Gi...and for me, there are other applications of solace.

~

I worry about the future. This has always been a problem I’ve struggled and battled with. I worry about my financial stability, about my family's health, my kid's schooling, my wife's business, my job, my friends, my relationships, my well-being. And when I allow that rogue beast Worry to roam free, it does nothing but further feed and breed Fear. (No, not fear in the sense of being afraid of something or someone. But fear in the sense of Fear itself).

Too often I fall into the trap of living in the Past. Analyzing whether this or that choice or decision could have changed where I find myself today. When I open the memories and doorways to the past I run the risk of flooding myself with regret for what might-have-been.

When I spend my energy worrying about Tomorrow and regretful for Yesterday, I do nothing but destroy my Today. The illusion is that our Today – our Now – is a tiny hairline separating Yesterday from Tomorrow. The truth of the matter is that there is no future and there is no past, but only an eternally endless Now.

“Alan Watts likened the practice of living from our center to martial arts, where we are encouraged to “stay always in the center position, and stay always here”. He says, “If you expect something to come in a certain way, by the time you reposition your energy, it is too late. So stay in the center, and you will be ready to move in any direction”. When living from your center, in the now, he adds, “you stand a much better chance of being able to deal with the unforeseen than if you keep worrying about it” ²

I have found practicing the Tuls (patterns) in Taekwon-do extremely “centering” and a near form of Meditation. The concentration and focus clears the mind, forcing me to forget everything but the Now, returning the balance.

I do not miss the point of every pattern (at least to my limited knowledge) begins in one position and returns to this same position. A centering. A balance point.

I believe General Choi deliberately encouraged this symbolism of centering; reigning in our runaway imaginations – not dwelling on the past and not worrying about the future, but always returning to this state of centeredness.

I believe the trick is to borrow this learned wisdom as we practice it in our patterns and apply it to our lives on a daily level. It can only make us better and stronger.

I have found the Patterns bring me a tranquility; a peace of mind during difficult times; soothing as a meditation and finds for me an inner peace. I can remember during that extremely stressful time (May – June 2009) when we sold our old house and purchased our new home, practicing the patterns in class was the only time I enjoyed peace of mind.

Compassion

“I shall build a more peaceful world”

This is a difficult one. I am sure nearly everyone would at least in theory agree that this is a good and noble oath... but it is easier said than done. The question is, how do I attempt to accomplish this?

Within the gym it manifests itself with respect for others, humility, and most importantly, I believe, teaching and mentoring the young (whether directly or through example). For the young are the future.

“Tao gave birth to One,
One gave birth to Two,
Two gave birth to Three,
Three gave birth to all the myriads things of the universe.³

Kanji (text) from tattoo

Without a somewhat long explanation, the simplest way to explain this saying is to say that Truth is progressive. It is not a static thing. It is a living, growing, and evolving thing. Failure to see or realize this is to ultimately fall victim to religiosity.

I had spent my entire education within the Roman Catholic school system. Nearly my entire youth was spent in conflict with a rigid institution based upon inflexible Tradition. Although I hold value in Tradition – it allows us to have an identity, something to call 'home', a culture – when dealing with an overpowering tradition for no other purpose but its own, it becomes oppressive and flies in the face of truth. Unchangeable, immutable, inflexible Tradition is a dead and dusty thing.

It was so refreshing to see Florin's Ultimate Martial Arts Centre's motto on their vans,

“Where Tradition Meets the Future”.

It is the values of Tradition yet with the living openness for growth, learning, and evolving! And for me, coming out of years and years of struggling conflict, it was like a breath of fresh air!

“I shall build a more peaceful world”

These are powerful words.

It is this oath that must transcend the boundaries of the gym. I see this as living Compassion.

But rather than ask how might I accomplish this, maybe I should ask what stands in peace's and compassion's way?

What is an obstacle to peace?

Worry, anxiety, Fear of what might yet be. Fear kills the Future; murders its potential; slays the perpetual Now, for it is in the Now that Fear's price is paid...

Fear is my greatest enemy.

It is a battle I’ve fought my entire life and one I continue to wage war with.

I have battled and struggled with worry, anxiety, and Fear for far too long. One of the driving reasons why I choose to study the martial arts of Taekwon-do was to at least attempt to combat this internal Fear. Through Taekwon-do I can see this desire and growth with the meanings of its belt colours:

• White is innocence.
• Yellow is the fertile earth from which a plant sprouts and take root.
• Green signifies the plant's growth and its reaching towards the sky.
• Blue signifies the heavens and sky towards which the plant matures into a towering tree.
• Red is the colour of the plant's first fruits. Red indicates danger. The student has sufficient skills to inflict injury to an opponent so must exercise caution and control. The red also acts as a warning to opponents.
• The Black belt is the exact opposite of white. The black colour represents the student's ability to overcome Fear and triumph over Darkness.

The Dragon of my tattoo represents a striving for this fearlessness; the confrontation and triumph over this Darkness. Darkness is not only the absence of Light, but includes triumph over ignorance. (And Fear is the child of ignorance). But defeating this Darkness – overcoming this ignorance – sometimes means actually embracing the unknowable; potentially one of the most divisive issues on this planet; Peace's greatest obstacle.

To me, Compassion towards my fellow man, woman, and child outweigh one's belief. And this, quietly, caringly, must be carried out into the world. We must teach and mentor the young. We must teach them how to think, not what to think. We must choose education over indoctrination. We must become humble ambassadors to the world.

Finale

I'll end by asking a question.

Once I remove everything that I have learned from Taekwon-do that can be measured and graded and tested in class;

Once I remove myself from the school;

Once I remove my uniform;

Once I remove my belt;

What is it that remains within me?

I believe the answer is solace and compassion.

In my soul I carry the spirit of the “Taekwon-do Dragon”. It is alive and well and lives and breathes in my very heart. It is what allows me to find confidence and peace within myself and compels me to show compassion and hold hope for a better and more peace filled world.

The symbol of the Dragon I literally carry in my skin, and it is this that I carry out into the world.

1 I think it's important to avoid confusing “power” with strength.

I believe “Power” is composed of 5 elements: 1) physical strength, 2) speed, 3) accuracy, 4) technique, and 5) belief.

Only when all of these elements are joined together do you truly find your “Power”.

When sparring (either in training, practice, or tournaments) the rule is 50% Power. (It shouldn't be full contact). The reasoning is that (I think) sparring in Taekwon-do is a points-system, not a brutal “knock-them-down-drag-them-out” sport.

However, that leaves us with the problem of how do we know what our “100% Power” is if we cannot use it in sparring? The use of board breaking is to demonstrate one's “Power” without inflicting it upon another human being or opponent. That is why, I believe, we do board breaking.

2 Candance B. Pert, The Molecules of Emotion: The Science Behind Mind-Body Medicine (New York: Touchstone, 1997), pg. 27

3 Excerpt from Tao Te Ching, verse 42, by Lao Tzu, founder of Taoism

i I had mentioned that this Dragon-tattoo is a summation of my spiritual journey for me in which TKD played a large influence, but not the only influence. If there is interest in learning more about the meanings and symbolism behind this tattoo, please feel free to visit my blog site and read more at http://pieceofburlap.blogspot.com/2010/12/tattoo-solace-in-pain.html.

The Paths We Walk

Fear or concern for a lack for resources for our continued survival drives us towards community or tribalism. Whether individuals or corporate entities, all begin from this position.

One is a legitimate concern for a lack for resources for continued survival. This ultimately will lead to co-dependence and build Community. The belief that our pooled resources are more valued than our individual resources.

The other is the Fear of a perceived lack for resources - possibly motivated by error, paranoia, or greed. Ultimately the lack of resources in this case isn't real. It is based upon fear and the error that their resources are a commodity; that their resources make them powerful compared to others.

There is a difference between fear and concern, but in this early stage they are difficult in not impossibly to differentiate. Early on, I am sure both are true to some degree. It only becomes important when a direction of growth occurs. Either one can easily morph into the other in these early formative stages. But ultimately once their footing is established they will develop along distinctively difference paths.

A legitimate concern for a lack of resources necessary for continued survival will build Community. This kind of social structure will eventually begin non-zero-sum thinking. It will also see the introduction of a limited or conditional compassion. This is important because, further down the road, there's the potential for the birth of true Compassion.

A perceived fear of a lack of resources (or simply a desire for a surplus) will breed Tribalism. This kind of social structure views the world in zero-sum terms. It has no choice but to develop Envy. Not only coveting what another has (whether an individual or rival tribe) but believing the other's loss is somehow their gain.

It is important to understand that we are redefining the terms Community and Tribalism here to identify two separate paths of development. These paths can and do apply to individuals, institutions, and corporate entities. 

But it is critically important that we pause for a moment and thoroughly understand what is meant by "resources". 

Yes, most definitely "resources" can mean food & shelter. But it can also include safety & security, affection & love. Even a newborn baby finds itself in this position of 'being driven by fear and/or concern for a lack of resources towards community or tribalism'. Its mother's milk and safety and warmth & affection are the baby's "resources". Its community or tribe can be its mother's relationship and family. It can live in community with its siblings, or it can live in tribal competition with them. 

But "resources" can be expanded to include a great many things. Resources can be anything needed - or perceived to be needed - for continued survival. For example, from a religious industry point of view, Salvation could meet these criteria. After all, by this thinking, Salvation is needed for "continued survival". And if this resource is mistaken for a commodity (power), we are led well into Tribalism.

Continuing along this path from Tribalism and its zero-sum mindset, there is no other direction for development but eventually to embrace Envy. And as mentioned earlier, Envy not only allows oneself to justify why they deserve what another has, it also can allow them to rationalize why the other doesn't even deserve what it has. Envy is created by Fear and breeds hatred.

But the individual or group/institute/entity/etc. is not yet without hope. At some point - whether directly or indirectly - they will be forced to face the fact that this Envy is at their heart or center. It is at this point where Confusion enters.

Although existing in a state of Confusion is not good or healthy, there is at least the potential for change and growth.

It is at this point where two paths emerge.

One path (Reflection) reverses its direction. It identifies the unfounded Fear that initially created its tribalism, accepts the truth for what it is ("Dharma"), purges its Envy and Fear, and undoes it. It learns and grows and evolves in a more positive and healthy direction.

In its alternate path (Denial) it continues in its Confusion, in denial of the truth. It attempts to justify and keep its Envy. It will delude itself into believing in a mock-compassion in order to perpetuate the illusion of community; this mock-compassion being really little more than Pity. In reality it practices Pity and Envy but convinces itself that it is Compassion and Righteousness.

At this point their ability to lie to themselves is well established; they have believed their own lies and non-truths. They have entered an existence of Delusion.

Delusion, Envy, and Fear are the key operative demons, with each solidifying and strengthening the other. It is a difficult position to escape from, primarily because there is no desire to escape. Its defense is to have convinced itself that it is right and correct - no change is needed. (On a side note, I think this is what ails modern day Christianity. It has evolved down this path of Tribalism under the disguise of "Community". It has mistakenly justified its Pity as Compassion and Envy as Righteousness. Where it should have followed another path...)

These are the paths to Entrapment. These are the warnings we must be aware of and mindful of. But what is a better path? What is it that we should strive for?

Once we can find ourselves able to Reflect is the turning point.
It is the escape from a state of Confusion.
It is the beginning of the end of being Ego-centric.
It is at this point that we self-question, self-analyze, and when Doubt enters.
Contrary to much religious thought, Doubt is anything but a lack of faith. Doubt is hope. Doubt is the beginning of spiritual growth. It is the prerequisite to approaching The Mu Portal.  Without Doubt we cannot self-assess.
Once we can begin to purge our competitive habits - our Envy, Fear, Delusions - once we can clear the Confusion and abandon our Tribal zero-sum thinking and begin embracing true Compassion, "Dharma", and begin finding Solace for ourselves are we on a healthy and spiritually enriching path - not only for ourselves, but for all those around us.

~

This confusing and seemingly meandering path applies to everyone and everything. Whether they are individual beings, organized institutions, religions, businesses, social groups, or corporate entities. The paths we walk apply to our internal, individual journeys, as well as to how our communities function and grow or stagnate.
Only if we are aware of the paths we walk, do we have any hope to effect their directions.

Compassion & Envy - Dharma & Delusion

Unwholesome thoughts are those that (are not conductive to freedom and happiness, but rather) promote suffering.
Unwholesome thoughts (also called unskillful thoughts) are connected to selfish desire, hatred, or delusion.
Therefore, selfish desire, hatred, fear, envy, and (especially) delusion promote suffering.

There is a particular pattern of unskillful thinking ("unwholesome thoughts") that most of us regularly practice nearly instinctively. It is a manner of thought strongly encouraged by our competitive culture. (and also fosters zero-sum thinking).

We have the insidious habit of seeing how we measure up to other people ("comparing mind"). Our culture is obsessed with it and thrives on it.

The most damning effect of this 'comparing mind' is the unnecessary suffering it causes. Not only do we feel bad about ourselves, but we begin to wish ill upon others - sometimes to the point where we are willing to take actions to realize those wishes. This is the birth of Envy.

Not only is Envy a stumbling block and obstacle to Compassion, but Envy fetters Compassion.

Compassion is a form of empathy, but much more than that. Compassion is action. It will not just sympathize, it'll do something about it. To only sympathize is Pity. And Pity is a very pale reflection of Compassion.

What will block and impede Compassion is Envy. Yes, there is fear and jealousy, but Envy is much more dangerous and damaging. With Envy there is also the intent or desire - either directly or indirectly - to inflict misfortune or harm onto another. Not only do you desire what they have, you don't wnat them to have what you possess (because what you possess is a commodity and makes you powerful). It is Compassion's opposite and a stumbling block.

Compassion
The capacity for compassion is our deepest nature as human beings. I believe we are all innately good.
(...and on a side note, I also think that doctrines like the Calvinists Total Depravity only further feeds Envy and slowly eliminates Compassion, allowing them to only - at best - show Pity).

Compassion does not require that we feel affection towards others. We can have compassion for our worst enemies. In fact, the very nature of true compassion might necessitate it. Compassion cannot be selective.

Compassion is not Pity, although the two are often easily confused. Pity is simply feeling sorry for someone who has to endure suffering, but pity keeps itself distance from suffering. Pity can't get past the element of fear; it's afraid of pain and suffering and wants to flee from its presence.

Compassion doesn't keep its distance. Compassion is willing to be with suffering up close and personal because it has learned to accept rather than resist pain.

Dharma
Although Dharma is a Buddhist term, I don't see the concept as exclusively Buddhist. I believe the Buddhist's understand it and draw from it, but don't "own" it.

Dharma is our openness and willingness to accept the truth as we discover it. Our receptiveness to it and our ability to allow it lead us, rather than force it to fit our preconceived notions and agendas. Our willingness to allow it to change and direct ourselves rather than twist and coerce and manipulate it.

It is dealing with the struggle and tension between truth and fact. (as they are not the same things).

The truth never needs defending. This is Dharma. Only our truths needs defending. This is Delusion.

If we are open and aware and allow ourselves to be led where ever it is that the truth leads us, we consistently reduce the levels of delusion in our lives.

Delusion is Dharma's enemy.

Instinct vs. Impermanence

"When we attach ourselves to impermanent objects - sensations, thoughts, feelings, people, things - we are always left with the stress and grief of loss, because everything around us is always changing; it is always being pulled beyond our reach. Our grasping, our fighting against impermanence, results in loss and the suffering that comes with trying to hold on to the constantly changing reality. It's rather like trying to play tug-of-war with a much stronger opponent; we begin to lose, as we always will, we can choose to let go or to hold on and receive the "rope buns" of attachment. The survival instinct tells us to hold on; the Buddha urges us to let go."

"All unpleasant thoughts, feelings, and sensations are impermanent; trying to push them away is futile and results in stress, anger, and suffering. It's as if with our aversion we created a dam in the flow of experience. Rather than letting impermanence do its job, we block the passing of pain. We do this in a variety of ways - through suppression, avoidance  ignoring  self-medicating, or hardening the heart and closing down to life. Again, as a survival instinct aversion is necessary - we have to hate pain to survive - but it doesn't leave us with much freedom or happiness. when it comes to aversion, the survival-based life is a life of fear and loathing. Our instincts tell us to hate pain and try to get rid of it; the Buddha urges us to meet pain with mercy and compassion."

"We can all concede... that everything is impermanent... [T]he evolved human condition has resulted in a brain that creates a self. The sense of being a permanent fixed identity - a self - is a construction of the mind/body. Each one of us is a constantly evolving and unfolding process, not a fixed identity. This aspect of reality - that is, our own changing nature - seems to be at odds with the human survival instinct, so the mind creates a fixed identity that takes everything personally and clings to the notion of "I", "me", and "mind". But this solution is based on ignorance and a lack of investigation. Believing in a permanent self is like believing in a permanent rainbow. We all know that rainbows are temporary optical illusions based on the factors of sunlight, moisture, and heat. The environment creates each rainbow like a mind creates a self. Both creations are relatively real, in that we can genuinely experience them temporarily, but just as the factors that create the illusion (whether rainbow or self) arose, so will they also pass.  There is no permanent self; there is no permanent rainbow. It is not true to say that there is no self at all or that everything is empty or illusory, but it is true that everything is constantly changing and that there is no solid, permanent, unchanging self within the process that is life. Everything and everyone is an unfolding process."

Excerpts from "Wide Awake", by Noah Levine.

Wolves and Meditation

Funny thing meditation. Basically, it is nothing but simply sitting down, doing nothing, and being aware.
By strictest definition, it's nearly pointless. Yet that pointlessness make it a radical act as it totally flies in the face of what the world demands of us. The paradox is that this radical act of stopping, doing nothing, and just being mindful can be the most transformative, healing, and positive thing we could ever do... paying attention.

Only the items I notice shape my mind.
Ultimately, what we allow ourselves to notice literally determines our experiences. Attention determines our degree of awareness with our ordinary experiences and shapes the world around us.

Our level of awareness determines the content and quality of our lives.

There's an old Native American story.

A grandfather tells a story to his grandson, "I have two wolves fighting in my heart. One wolf is vengeful, fearful, envious, resentful, deceitful. The other wolf is loving, compassionate, generous, truthful, and serene."
The grandson asks which wolf will win the fight.
The grandfather answers, "The one I feed."

However, if we refuse to deal with or acknowledge what's difficult and painful - ignoring it; pretending it doesn't exist - whatever we neglect withers and retreats below our consciousness, where it may still affect our lives. In a twisted and perverse way, ignoring the painful and the difficult is just another way of feeding the wolf. So it is not only a simple matter of which one we focus on.  Meditation brings us all human experiences and all parts of ourselves - to be aware of both wolves.

Tribal Identities

I believe mankind has within it the potential to make a giant evolutionary leap forward - possible into what some might call the Noosphere - and evolve past our tribal condition. But I think this needs some careful thought and introspection.

All great evolutionary leaps and bounds have typically had a catalyst. There was a time I thought humanity needed that catalyst, that 'push' to abandon tribalism and unify. Movies, TV, literature and culture would teach us that a unified threat would do it; like an alien invasion of Earth for example.
...but this isn't the evolutionary jump we're dealing with here. This is just another - granted larger - definition of 'tribe'.

I suspect that we are instinctively hardwired towards tribalism. It's a survival trait that we need - or possibly - needed.

I'm not convinced we still need it.
Although I am convinced that tribalism is alive and well.

...but what draws us to it? Ultimately I think it is identity and our need for it. We create and build our identity (both personal and corporate) from our 'tribes', don't we?

In this multi-billion dollar new age industry of online multiplayer, first-person video games we belong to a team - red team, blue team - it matters little.

Another popular, fun, and entertaining game is Magic, The Gathering.
We can affiliate ourselves with various fictional groups and guilds: The Azorius Senate, House Dimir, the Gruul Clans - all with their own pins, T-shirts, and paraphernalia should we so choose to engage and associate ourselves with one tribe or another. It's all fun.

Too juvenile for you?  Alright. Let's mature and 'grow up' a little then. What about hockey jerseys? Loyalty to one's sports team, be it hockey, American football (...or baseball... or basketball), or European Soccer. It's odd that the degree of seriousness and fanaticism matures along with its "non-juvenile audience".


It provides us with our need for identity (at least temporarily and superficially).

This isn't restricted to our games and recreation and entertainment only. In fact, the more grown-up or serious or important we can make our tribal corporate identities appear, the more 'real' and important our tribes become.

We enter into the world of political affiliations. What are you? A Conservative? A Liberal? Labour? Republican? Democrat? Whether its loyalty to a specific political party (or a cult of personality), or a specific political philosophy, we are generally expected to belong to one.

Through my experiences, most people do not clearly, cleanly, or easily belong under one philosophical political umbrella, but bits and pieces of many. It becomes another artificial piece of our identity.

Not serious or mature or grown-up enough? There's still more. Religious affiliations.
Religious affiliation is all about tribal (corporate) identity. ...Yes, most will venomously deny this. They'll claim their religion is about compassion and love, not tribal identity. But Compassion is an evolutionary step away from Tribalism.
True Compassion and Tribal identity are incompatible.
Compassion necessitates charity of some sort as well as selflessness.
Once we begin down that path of giving up a sense (and definition) of Self, so too do we move away from our delusional sense of Ego and begin distancing ourselves from identity.

The compassion that many religions offer is really just pity. Possibly the real compassion is reserved for the exclusivity of its members, like an insurance policy. But conditional compassion - compassion bound by tribal borders - is not compassion.

Our entertainment, our sports, our political views, and religion, and even our work. All these sources of identity that we seek out and cling to only ever reinforce and build the Ego. Our identities are founded on our Fear, Envy, and Delusion.

Envy is Compassion's opposite, for not only does Envy look out for 'number one' (ourselves), it also desires others not to have and to be without. Envy thrives on their failures as well on its success.

Our fearful and envy-driven Ego embraces a Zero-Sum belief or worldview. In order for there to be a winner, there must be a loser. In order for me to succeed, someone must fail. Paying the workforce less makes more profit.
Every source that supports the Ego and builds our identities subscribe to this. Labour Unions are perfect examples of an Envy-based Zero-Sum system.

The Zero-Sum worldview of the Ego cannot fully understand the concept of Compassion. If I give something away with no return, I simply have less and the other gains. (Capitalism/Consumerism is founded against this). I think this is where many institutional religions fail. Although they are attempting to practice and promote Compassion, they are still stuck in their Zero-Sum views. The only logical justification for Compassion and Charity in a Zero-Sum system is a reward in the afterlife (Paradise, Heaven, etc.), but ultimately this only creates self-serving (albeit well hidden) spiritual hedonists*. (You're only doing it for the fair exchange you're hoping to come in the afterlife).

True Compassion only properly functions in a Non-Zero-Sum system. In fact, Compassion embraces it.
Non-Zero-Sum believes that you can have win-win scenarios.
"It's not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game". My success is dependent upon the team's success. Pay and treat the workforce properly and appropriately and the business will profit.
Universal Health Care is a perfect example. Yes, through taxes, the wealthier will pay to support the less wealthy worker, but a stable and healthy workforce benefits the entire system. There are no losers in this system. This is Non-Zero-Sum.

I think religions functioning within a Zero-Sum worldview had limited potential but was the best we could hope for in its day and age. But I wonder if we are on a spiritual cusp; at the verge of entering a Non-Zero-Sum worldview.

What happens, spiritually, when we decide to abandon our religious identities?
What does this look like? What does that make us become? Could this be this elusive Kingdom of God that Yeshua speaks of? Could this be the clean and clear mind of Enlightenment the Buddha teaches we are already in possession of?
Why are we so driven to find and establish our alleged identities?
Could this very act be what blinds us all?


















*(On a side note, I think this is where Paul and Yeshua may differ. I believe the Kingdom of God that Yeshua refers to ("One day the Pharisees asked Jesus, "When will the Kingdom of God come?" Jesus replied, "The Kingdom of God can't be detected by visible signs. You won't be able to say, "Here it is!" or "It's over there!" For the Kingdom of God is within you". Luke 17:20-21, NLT) is a corporate entity that embraces Non-Zero-Sum thinking, while Paul - for all his good intentions - was stuck attempting to understand this Kingdom of God through his Zero-Sum perspective ("I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us." Phil. 3:14, NLT).

"God's Favorite Place on Earth" by Frank Viola: Commentary and Review

Allow me to apologize in advance. This short book review is more about me than the book itself. I have often wondered, as a non-Christian (or maybe an ex-Christian... or maybe I never really was a Christian... Good God! maybe the Calvinists were right!), why do I write book reviews of Christian books? And why do book authors and Christian book publishers want my opinions, and why are people (or Christians) interested in my non-Christian thoughts?

Well, ultimately, I think I know why. I may be a non-Christian but I have not totally abandoned everything Christianity has of value. I would rather not define myself as a non-Christian or an ex-Christian, but as simply having moved beyond Christianity (and that necessitates keeping or absorbing at least some aspects and values of it). And that gives me a somewhat clearer vision of what I see, hear, and read.

Christian books in the past that have received bad or poor reviews from me generally have certain unfavourable elements. They use bait-and-switch trickery and mislead; they are too preachy and condemning or judgmental; sometimes they simply can't connect to the common man.

This book however - "God's Favorite Place on Earth" - is none of these things. The author starts out by comparing the tiny town of Bethany to the colossus Jerusalem. I believe the messages and lessons Frank Viola is attempting to communicate are good, simple Christian ones (mind you, for the internal Church-going Christian; not those on the fringe)... but he never seems to get any traction. He failed to ever grab my attention or interest. Although not a long book, I read through it like it was a task, an obligation. (It was as joyous as reading through the book of Leviticus).

I wish I could say or comment more, but unfortunately I have little more to add. It simply wasn't an engaging book.







Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the author and/or publisher through the Speakeasy blogging book review network  I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255.

Entrapment

I believe it was the Buddha that had once said we are all enlightened beings; we just don't know it yet.

Our natural state is enlightened. I'll borrow from the Taoists when I say I believe our innate state is our Wu Wei Nature, it's just blocked.

I call this state, or at least the avenue towards it, The Dharma Entanglement.

“Solace and Compassion are entangled by Dharma”.

It's important to understand what these terms are and aren't.

Solace is basically inner peace. Solace calms one's fear of suffering. Fear is its opposite and fear fetters solace.

Compassion is a form of empathy, but much more than that. Compassion is action. It will not just sympathize, it'll do something about it. To only sympathize is Pity. And Pity is a very pale reflection of Compassion.

What will block and impede Compassion is Envy. Yes, there is fear and jealousy, but Envy is much more damaging and dangerous. With Envy there is also the intent or desire (either directly or indirectly) to inflict misfortune or harm onto another. Not only do you desire what they have, you don't want them to have what you possess. It is Compassion's opposite and a stumbling block.

Although Dharma is a Buddhist term, I don't see the concept as exclusively Buddhist. I believe the Buddhist's understand it and draw from it, but don't 'own' it.

Dharma is our openness and willingness to accept the truth, whatever it may be. Our receptiveness to it and our ability to allow it to lead us, rather than force it to fit our preconcieved notions and agendas.

The truth never needs defending. Only our truths needs defending.

If we are open and aware and allow ourselves to be led where ever it is that the truth leads us, we consistently reduce the levels of delusion in our lives.

Delusion is Dharma's enemy.

Solace and Compassion are entangled by Dharma.

These three form The Dharma Entanglement, and this leads us back to our innate Wu Wei Natures.

Fear, Envy, and Delusion lead us astray. They form our illusionary Ego and our Ego entraps us, imprisons us, and stagnates our spiritual growth.

When we associate ourselves with some sort of tribal identity we add to this toxic concoction a Corporate Ego as well.

This tribalism of Corporate Entities can be anything from a favourite sport's team, to a political party or position, to a nationalist (being patriotic), to religious affiliation, and the list goes on.